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Joke Topic - 'Husbands' - Page 2 - With 6 More Jokes and Funny Stories
This woman went to the doctor. She said, 'Doctor, my husband thinks he's a cat.'
The doctor said, 'How do you know that?'
She answered, 'Well, every night when I go to bed, there's this dreadful howling outside the window.
The doctor said, 'Yes, but are you sure that that's your husband?'
She said, 'Well, a cat wouldn't use language like that.'
3>The doctor said, 'How do you know that?'
She answered, 'Well, every night when I go to bed, there's this dreadful howling outside the window.
The doctor said, 'Yes, but are you sure that that's your husband?'
She said, 'Well, a cat wouldn't use language like that.'
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow.
1>A widow.
Where can a husband always find sympathy?
In the dictionary.
1>In the dictionary.
Wife: One more word from you, and I will leave you and go back to my mother.
Husband: Taxi!
2>Husband: Taxi!
Wife: To think that I had to marry you in order to realize how foolish you truly are.
Husband: When I asked you to marry me, you ought to have recognized that.
2>Husband: When I asked you to marry me, you ought to have recognized that.
Wife: Why did you come home at 4 am this morning?
Husband: Where else can you go at 4 in the morning in this town?
2>Husband: Where else can you go at 4 in the morning in this town?
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Coffee
Why couldn't the coffee bean go out to play with his friends?
He was grounded.
2>He was grounded.
Vampires
Which vampire likes to eat junk food?
Snackula.
2>Snackula.
Schools
Teacher to Pupil: What do you get if you divide 2365 by 37?
Pupil: The wrong answer, I expect, Miss.
2>Pupil: The wrong answer, I expect, Miss.
Cats
Why did the two cats get married?
They were a purr-fect match.
2>They were a purr-fect match.
Christmas
What do you call a man who claps his hands at Christmas?
Santapplause.
2>Santapplause.
Daughters
Boy: Sir, I'd like your daughter for my wife.
Father: Can't she get one of her own?
2>Father: Can't she get one of her own?
Friends
What do you call a man and woman who keep showing you up in front of your friends?
Mum and Dad!
2>Mum and Dad!
Teachers
Where do mad teachers go to get trained?
Looney-versity.
2>Looney-versity.
Airplanes
You know you're having a bad day when - Airline food starts to taste good.
2>