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Joke Topic - 'House'
A decorator was painting a house and the owner came home to find the man rushing about like a mad thing with his brushes.
'Why are you working so fast?' he asked.
'Well, you see, sir, the paint's running low and I want to finish the job before it's all gone.'
'Why are you working so fast?' he asked.
'Well, you see, sir, the paint's running low and I want to finish the job before it's all gone.'
I am the master in my own house - the doghouse.
What should you do if you lock yourself out of your house?
Keep singing until you find the right key.
Keep singing until you find the right key.
You know you're a redneck if:
Your Truck has curtains, but your house doesn't.
Your porch collapses, and it kills more than seven dogs.
Every car you've ever owned is in your backyard.
Your Truck has curtains, but your house doesn't.
Your porch collapses, and it kills more than seven dogs.
Every car you've ever owned is in your backyard.
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Having A Bad Day
You know you're having a bad day when the bird singing outside your window is a vulture.
Doctors
Doctor, Doctor I've just swallowed a pen.
Well sit down and write your name!
Well sit down and write your name!
A Monkey
If a monkey is just like his father, what is he frequently called?
A chimp off the old block.
A chimp off the old block.
Crab
"Waiter, do you serve crabs?"
"Sit down, sir. We serve anybody."
"Sit down, sir. We serve anybody."
Bankrupt
Did you hear about the guy who went bankrupt in the laundry business?
He said he was all washed up.
He said he was all washed up.
Car
Patient: Doctor, I feel like a car!
Doctor: Well, just park yourself over there.
Doctor: Well, just park yourself over there.
Pigs
Why did the pig want to become an actor?
Because he was such a ham.
Because he was such a ham.
Bees
What do you call a bee that's had a spell cast on him?
Bee-witched.
Bee-witched.
Crawling
They call him Caterpillar.
Why do they call him that?
Because he got where he is by crawling.
Why do they call him that?
Because he got where he is by crawling.
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