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Joke Topic - 'Horses'
Here are 27 jokes on the topic - 'Horses'.
A horse enters a bar, sits down, and the bartender asks, 'Why the long face?'
Then a second horse walks in with jumper cables attached to its head. He sits down, and the bartender says, 'I don't mind the long face, but don't you go and try to start anything!'
Then a second horse walks in with jumper cables attached to its head. He sits down, and the bartender says, 'I don't mind the long face, but don't you go and try to start anything!'
A man was driving down an isolated country lane when, all of a sudden, his car stopped. He stepped out of the car and looked inside the bonnet to see if he could fix it. After a while, a horse ambled up beside him, had a look at the car, and said:
'Your trouble is probably in the carburetor.'
The man was so amazed that he ran down the road until he met the farmer walking towards him. He stopped the farmer and told him exactly what had happened.
'Did the horse have a white patch in the middle of his forehead?' asked the farmer.
'Yes, yes!' cried the motorist.
'Don't pay any attention, then,' said the farmer, 'that was only old Dobbin, and he doesn't know a thing about cars.'
'Your trouble is probably in the carburetor.'
The man was so amazed that he ran down the road until he met the farmer walking towards him. He stopped the farmer and told him exactly what had happened.
'Did the horse have a white patch in the middle of his forehead?' asked the farmer.
'Yes, yes!' cried the motorist.
'Don't pay any attention, then,' said the farmer, 'that was only old Dobbin, and he doesn't know a thing about cars.'
A woman was considering buying an aging Thoroughbred but wanted a veterinarian's opinion of the horse before finalizing her deal. She asked when the vet had completed his examination - 'Will I be able to race him?'
The veterinarian looked at the woman and the horse. 'Sure,' he replied, 'and you'll probably win!'
The veterinarian looked at the woman and the horse. 'Sure,' he replied, 'and you'll probably win!'
Did you hear about the horse that has made over twenty movies?
He's not a star, though; he just does bit parts.
He's not a star, though; he just does bit parts.
Did you hear about the horse who became depressed?
He started telling tales of whoa.
He started telling tales of whoa.
Did you hear about the Scotsman who gave a waiter a tip?
The horse lost.
The horse lost.
How would you spell "hungry horse" with only four letters?
M, T, G, G.
M, T, G, G.
My mum asked my uncle, 'What's got four legs and flies?'
My uncle said, 'Don't tell me the horse is dead.'
My uncle said, 'Don't tell me the horse is dead.'
Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a horse.
Doctor: Don't worry, I'll give you something to make your condition more stable!
Doctor: Don't worry, I'll give you something to make your condition more stable!
The thunder god went for a ride on his favorite horse,
'I'm Thor,' he cried.
The horse replied:
'You forgot the thaddle, thilly.'
'I'm Thor,' he cried.
The horse replied:
'You forgot the thaddle, thilly.'
What animal goes to bed with his shoes on?
A horse.
A horse.
What breed of dog rides a horse named Macaroni?
Yankee poodle!
Yankee poodle!