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Joke Topic - 'Horses'

Here are 22 jokes on the topic - 'Horses'.


A horse walks into a bar, he sits down and the bartender asks him, "Why the long face?"
Then a second horse walks in with jumper cables attached to it's head, he sits down, and the bartender says, "I don't mind the long face, but don't u go and try to start anything!"

A man's car suddenly stopped dead when he was driving down the middle of a country lane. He stepped out of the car and looked inside the bonnet to see if he could fix it. After a while a horse ambled up beside him, had a look at the car and said:
'Your trouble is probably in the carburetor.'
The man was so amazed that he ran down the road until he met the farmer walking towards him. He stopped the farmer and told him exactly what had happened.
'Did the horse have a white patch in the middle of his forehead?' asked the farmer.
'Yes, yes!' cried the motorist.
'Don't pay any attention, then,' said the farmer, 'that was only old Dobbin and he doesn't know a thing about cars.'

A women was considering buying an aging Thoroughbred but wanted a veterinarian's opinion of the horse before finalizing her deal. She asked when the vet had completed his examination - "Will I be able to race him?"
The veterinarian looked at the woman, then at the horse. "Sure" he replied, "and you'll probably win!"

Did you hear about the horse that has made over twenty movies?
He's not a star though, he just does bit parts.

How do you spell hungry horse in four letters?
M, T, G, G.

My mum said to my uncle, 'What's got four legs and flies?'
My uncle said, 'Don't tell me, the horse is dead.'

The thunder god went for a ride on his favourite horse,
'I'm Thor' he cried.
The horse replied:
'You forgot the thaddle, thilly.'

What animal goes to bed with his shoes on?
A horse.

What breed of dog rides a horse named Macaroni?
Yankee poodle!

What did one horse say to the other one? Any friend of yours is a palomino.

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