Home / Joke Topics Index / Joke Topics - H / Joke Topic - Holidays - 1

Joke Topic - 'Holidays'


Here are 5 jokes on the topic - 'Holidays'.

Related Topics: Vacation (11) Vacations (8) Holiday (3)
$text4

A man arrived at his holiday guest-house and met the landlady.
'Can you sing?' she snapped.
'No,' he replied.
'Well, you'd better learn quickly. There's no lock on the bathroom door.'
$text4

A poor little East End kid was taken away to the country for his first holiday and as he got out of the train at his destination he looked around in bewilderment. 'Blimeyl What a lot of grass to keep off.'
$text4

Two little East End kids were paddling in the sea at Southend. 'Cor,' said one, 'look at your feet. They ain't half dirty.'
'Well, we didn't have no 'oliday last year.'
$text4

What is a Count Dracula's favorite holiday?
Fangs-giving.
$text4

What is grey, has four legs and a trunk?
A mouse going on holiday.


Here are some randomly selected joke topics

$text4

Baseball

What is the difference between baseball and law?
In baseball, if you're caught stealing, you're out.
$text4

Blondes

Q: Why did the blonde scale the glass wall?
A: To see what was on the other side.
$text4

Chicken Soup

Diner: Waiter, your thumb is in my chicken soup.
Waiter: That's all right sir, it's not very hot.
$text4

Snowball

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Juicy.
Juicy who?
Juicy who threw the snowball at me?
$text4

Baker

Did you hear about the baker who got an electric shock?
He stood on a bun and a current ran up his leg.
$text4

Colors

What colors would you paint the sun and the wind?
The sun rose and the wind blue.
$text4

Bars

I'm watching my drinking, so now I only visit bars that have mirrors on the walls.
$text4

Birthdays

Well, this definitely is a surprise birthday party. There are only 39 candles on your cake!
$text4

Politics

What is the difference between crime and politics?
In crime it's take the money and run; in politics it's the other way around.

This is page 1 of 1