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Joke Topic - 'Holiday'

Here are 3 jokes on the topic - 'Holiday'.

Related Topics: Vacation (14) Vacations (8) Holidays (5)

A Scot from Aberdeen was on holiday in London and every night he returned to his hotel full of the wonders of the city. So much so that another guest asked: 'Is this your first visit?'
'Aye, it is.'
'You seem to be having a great time.'
'Aye, I am that.'
'And what's more, it's not just a holiday. It's my honeymoon as well.'
'Oh. Then where's your wife?'
'Och. She's been here before.'

A Scotsman went on a week's holiday to England. He took a clean shirt and a five pound note with him. When he arrived home he hadn't changed either of them.

Christmas - A holiday in which neither the past nor the future is of as much interest as the present.

Here are some randomly selected joke topics


Leave A Message

So long as phones can ring and eyes can see, So leave a message, and I'll get back to thee.


The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you've got it made.


You know you're having a bad day when you realize that you just sprayed spot remover under your arms instead of deodorant.


How many birthdays does the average man have?
Only one. When he was born.


Smile! It makes people wonder what you've been up to.


What do you call a duck that wears a mask and steals money from banks?
A robber duckie.


What do you call a man and woman who keep showing you up in front of your friends?
Mum and Dad!


This bloke said to my brother, 'I think I'm a clock you know.'
My brother said, 'Well don't get wound up about it.'


Q. What did the elf use to make him taller?
A. He used elf raising flour.

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