Joke Topic - 'Grandma'

I think we're in for a bad spell of wether.

Did you hear about the man who thought Bob Marley and the Wailers were the sailors who caught Moby Dick?

Which part of a fish weighs the most?
The scales.

Q: Why are elephants large, grey and wrinkled?
A: Because if they were small, white and smooth they'd be asprins.

I knew that I must be drunk when I started feeling sophisticated - and couldn't pronounce it.

If you can't read
Watch this space

Why do witches wear nametags?
So you can tell which witch is which.

What did the dog say when he sat on a piece of sandpaper?
Ruff.

l thought I might become a history teacher when I grew up, but then I realized there was no future in it.