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Joke Topic - 'Glasses'

Here are 4 jokes on the topic - 'Glasses'.


A traffic policeman stops a woman and asks to see her driving licence.
'Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses when driving.'
'Well,' replies the woman, 'I have contacts.'
'Lady, I don't care who you know, your still going to get a ticket.'

Billy: I went to the eye doctor because I was seeing spots in front of my eyes. He gave me glasses.
Paul: Did the glasses help?
Billy: They did, I can see the spots much more clearly now.

Tim: I hear you use three pairs of glasses.
Tom: That's right. One for reading, one for distance, and one to look for the other two.

Why did the teacher need to wear dark glasses?
Because she had such a bright class.

Here are some randomly selected joke topics



Primary maths pupil's answer to question, `take 9 from 246 as many times as possible': `I did it fifty times and I always got 237.'


Do you know me?
Yes, of course I know you.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
I thought you knew me!


'You wouldn't think I'd bought this car second-hand, would you?'
'No, I thought you'd made it yourself.'

No Difference

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Max who?
Max no difference to me.


Why did Dracula become a vegetarian?
Because stake doesn't agree with him.


What do you call a very young bee?
A babe-bee.


Passer-by: What are you digging for?
Workman: Money.
Passer-by: And when do you expect to get it?
Workman: Pay-day.


Heavy labor is aardvark ... but it pays well


Why did the clown wear loud socks?
So that his feet wouldn't fall asleep.

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