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Joke Topic - 'Girlfriends' - 4

This is page 4 of jokes on the topic - 'Girlfriends'.


One day a man was walking along the beach and found a bottle. He looked around and didn't see anyone so he opened it. A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out.
The genie said, "For your kindness I will grant you a wish, but only one."
The man thought for a minute and said, "I have always wanted to visit Hawaii but have never been able to because I'm afraid of flying and ships make me seasick. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii."
The genie thought for a minute and said, "No, I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved: the pilings needed to hold up the highway, how deep they would have to be to reach the bottom of the ocean. Think of all the pavement that would be needed. No, that is just too much to ask."
The man thought for a minute and then told the genie, "Well, there is one other thing that I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand my girlfriend. What makes her laugh and cry, why is she temperamental, why is she so difficult to get along with? Basically, what makes her tick?"
The genie considered for a few minutes and said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?"

Six girls are on vacation without their boyfriends. They are walking on a beach when they are attracted to the sight of a beautiful six-storey hotel.
Wishing to check in immediately, they walk in. They are greeted by a charming hotel manager who tells them: "Go up to each storey and you will see a sign. If you like what it says, we'll put you up there."
So the six girlfriends take the lift to the floor above, where they see this sign: "All the men here have no money, and are short and ugly." The girlfriends laugh and move off.
On the next storey, they are met by this sign: "All the men here have money, but are short and plain." The girls continue on their way.
At the third level, they see this sign: "All the men here have money, and are tall but ugly." The girls smile and move on.
On the fourth floor, the sign says: "All the men here have money, and are tall and handsome." This excites the girls and they are about to go get registered when they remember that there is one more storey above. So they head up there.
At the top, they see this big sign: "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that there is just no way to please a woman."

What did the artist say to his girlfriend?
"I love you with all my art."

What did the firefly say to his girlfriend?
You light up my life.

What did the pine tree say to his girlfriend?
I'm fir you.

What did the undertaker say to his new girlfriend?
Em-balmy about you.

When her boyfriend actually agrees with her, she lets him have his own way.

When I asked my girlfriend if I could see her home she handed me a picture of it.

Why are great girlfriends hard to find?
Because the right girls are like parking spaces - all the best ones are taken and the ones available are handicapped.

Why is a launderette not a good place to find a girlfriend?
If she cannot even afford to buy her own washing machine, she will never have enough money to support you.

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