The pilot of a small private plane ran out of fuel and decided to put it down on a road. He managed to coast into a gas station and said to the attendant, "Fill 'er up!"
The attendant just looked at the pilot.
"Bet you don't get too many airplanes asking for a fuel," said the pilot.
The attendant replied, "True, most pilots use the airport just over there."
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Snowball
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Juicy.
Juicy who?
Juicy who threw the snowball at me?
Dogs
What breed of dog sweats the most and drinks a lot of water?
A hot-weiler!
Waiters
Customer: Waiter, there is there a small bug in my salad?
Waiter: l'm terribly sorry. Would you like me to get you a bigger one?
Girlfriends
GILLIE: Will I lose my looks as I get older?
WILLIE: With luck, yes.
Drink
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt.
Dandruff
Is your name Dan Druff?
You always get into people's hair.
Cannibals
First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?"
Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
Inventors
Did you hear about the famous inventors who failed to invent the aeroplane?
They were the Wrong Brothers.
Multitasking
Multitasking - screwing up several things at once.