Mary announced that she was going to start a diet to lose some pounds she had put on recently. "Great," Sue exclaimed. "I'm ready to start a diet too. We can be dieting buddies and help each other out. And when I feel the urge to drive out and get a burger and fries, I'll call you first."
"Fantastic," Mary replied. "I'll come with you."
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Cows
What do you get if you cross a cow with a grass cutter?
A lawn mooer.
Christmas
What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the normal alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
Vampires
Why doesn't Count Dracula give up being a vampire?
He can't. It's in his blood.
Drink
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt.
Farmers
Why did the farmer feed his pigs sugar and vinegar?
He wanted sweet and sour pork.
Kangaroos
What animal likes a leap year?
A kangaroo.
Hypochondriacs
Hypochondriacs make me sick
Knock Knock
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Dewey.
Dewey who?
Dewey stay or do we go?
Politicians
I think, therefore I'm not an MP. - (Member of Parliament)