A little girl asked her father, 'do all fairy tales begin with "Once upon a time"?
The father replied, 'No, some begin with - If I am elected.'
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Stupid
I come from a stupid family. During the civil war my great uncle fought for the west!
Business Consultant
An business consultant is one who can tell you how to run your business but who isn't smart enough to run his own.
Online Banking
Some people go online to their bank to get their balance. I just shake mine.
Snow
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Snow
Snow who?
Snow good asking me.
Snails
Waiter, waiter.
Are there snails on the menu?
Yes there are, Sir, I'm afraid they must have escaped from the kitchen.
Fish
Where do fish wash?
In a river basin.
Birds
Q: What do you get if you cross a bird with a magician?
A: A flying sorcerer.
Upgrade
The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
The Statue Of Liberty
Q. What does the Statue of Liberty stand for?
A. Because it can't sit down.