Joke Topic - 'Entertainment'

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a bottle of gin.
I think you need a little tonic.

Q: What are the worst six years in a blonde's life?
A: Third Grade.

Bill: Why do you want to be buried at sea?
Fred: Because my wife says she wants to dance on my grave.

Old doughnut makers never die, they just get tired of the whole business.

What do you call an overweight Egyptian mummy?
Two ton Carmen.

Knock, knock.
Who's there!
Ice cream!
Ice cream who?
Ice cream if you don't open this door!

My mother in law called today...
I knew it was her, when she knocked on the front door all the mice threw themselves on the traps!

Ted: My birthday is coming soon. Do you know what I need?
Tim: Yes, I know what you need, but how do you gift wrap a life?

What type of vegetables do plumbers fix?
Leeks.