Some small-time crooks decided that people were so stupid that they would
accept 18 dollar bills if somebody gave then any. So they carefully made some
plates and printed some up, and went to a small town to try them out. They got
up to a shopkeeper and talked for awhile, then casually said "Say, can you give
me change for an 18 dollar bill?" "Sure" said the old shopkeeper. "What would
you like, three 6's or two 9's?"
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Retiring
Doctor: The best time to take a bath is just before retiring.
Patient: You mean I don't need another bath until I'm sixty-five?
Christmas
What do male sheep sing at Christmas?
Ewele-tide Carols!
Woodworm
Why did the woodworm eat a sofa and two easy chairs?
It had a suite tooth.
Cats
And now spell mousetrap in three letters.
C, A, T
Lizards
Why did the lizard decide to go on a diet?
Because it weighed too much for its scales.
Knock Knock
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Statue.
Statue who?
Statue? This is me.
Kissed
What’s it like to he kissed by a vampire?
It's a real pain in the neck.
Fathers
George: Is your father still in the hospital?
William: Yes. He's in the Expensive Care Unit.
Illiterate
Illiterate? Call this number for help.