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Joke Topic - 'Dogs' - Page 2 - With 12 More Jokes and Funny Stories
Brian: Yesterday, my dog grabbed my dictionary and started chewing it. Fred: So what did you do?
Brian: I took the words right out of his mouth.
2>Brian: I took the words right out of his mouth.
Calling you a dogface would be an insult to dogs.
1>Customer: Why don't you have doggie bags?
Waiter: That would be considered cruelty to animals.
2>Waiter: That would be considered cruelty to animals.
Did you hear about the dog that ate nothing but garlic?
His bark was much worse than his bite.
2>His bark was much worse than his bite.
Did you hear about the dog who went to a flea circus?
No, what happened?
He stole the show.
2>No, what happened?
He stole the show.
Did you hear about the dog who went to college?
He won a collarship.
1>He won a collarship.
Did you hear about the man in Edinburgh who was selling his dog?
An American offered him 500 pounds for it, and an Englishman offered him 50 pounds.
Even though the American had offered more, he decided to sell it to the Englishman because he thought it might be able to walk back to Edinburgh from England, but it could never swim the Atlantic.
3>An American offered him 500 pounds for it, and an Englishman offered him 50 pounds.
Even though the American had offered more, he decided to sell it to the Englishman because he thought it might be able to walk back to Edinburgh from England, but it could never swim the Atlantic.
Did you hear about the optician who tripped over a dog?
He made quite a spectacle of himself.
2>He made quite a spectacle of himself.
Did you hear about the paranoid bloodhound?
He was convinced that certain people were following him.
2>He was convinced that certain people were following him.
Did you hear about the Scottish father who had a dilemma? His son wanted a dog, and his daughter wanted a cat. He felt that having a cat and a dog would be too expensive. So he bought a cat and taught it to bark!
3>Did you hear about the skeleton that a dog attacked?
It ran off with some bones, leaving him without a leg to stand on.
2>It ran off with some bones, leaving him without a leg to stand on.
Did you hear about the vampire's new dog?
It's a bloodhound!
1>It's a bloodhound!