Plumbers
What did the plumber say to his girlfriend called Flo when he wanted to find a new girlfriend?
It's all over Flo.
Dogs
Every dog has its day; only a dog with a broken tail has a weak end.
Blondes
What do you call a basement full of blondes?
A whine cellar.
Soup
Diner: How's your chicken soup today?
Waiter: It's pretty fowl.
Dumb
I'm not as dumb as you look.
Dracula
What is Count Dracula's favorite type of coffee?
De-coffin-ated.
Christmas Presents
Who brings Christmas presents to the baby sharks?
Santa jaws.
Rain
Coincide: What you do when it starts to rain!
Golf
Wife: Sorry, but you can't go to the golf course today.
Husband: Okay, in that case, I'll just putter around the yard.