Joke Topic - 'Complaining'

Did you hear about the millionaire clock and watchmaker who died recently.
They reckon it will take years to wind up his estate.

What's green, has four legs and two trunks?
Two seasick tourists.

How do you murder a blonde?
Put spikes on her shoulder pads.

Of course I'm listening to you don't you see me yawning?

"Hello, is this the person to whom I am speaking?"

If tires hold up cars, what holds up airplanes?
Hijackers.

The landlord said he wanted me to treat the place like my own home. So I did - I didn't pay the rent.

Which type of bugs are the messiest
litterbugs.

Nothing succeeds like a budgie with no teeth.