Joke Topic - 'Company Policy'

If King Kong went to Hong Kong to play ping-pong and died, what would they put on his coffin?
A lid.

An business consultant is one who can tell you how to run your business but who isn't smart enough to run his own.

Where can you find a good lawyer?
In the graveyard.

Someday my boat will come in
- and with my luck I'll be at the airport

Twelve year old's essay on 'what would you do to try and encourage motorists to show more consideration for others?': 'I would drive a police car.'

My girlfriend is just like a fine French Impressionist painting. She's very lovely, but is best appreciated at a distance.

The statesman shears the sheep, the politician skins them.

My mother in law called today...
I knew it was her, when she knocked on the front door all the mice threw themselves on the traps!

What do you call a veterinary surgeon with laryngitis?
A hoarse doctor.