Work
If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
Cinderella
Why was Cinderella dropped from the football team?
She ran away from the ball.
Elections
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Alec.
Alec who?
An election is held about every four years.
Idiots
All men are idiots. I married their king.
Live
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Miri.
Miri, who?
Miri me and we'll live happily ever after.
Water
What is another name for a water otter?
A kettle.
Cows
What do cows like to read at the breakfast table?
The daily moospaper!
Cats
What kind of cats are good at 10-pin bowling?
Alley cats.
Nature
When I look at you, I wonder what Mother Nature had in mind.