Joke Topic - 'Cell Phones'

Patient: Doctor, doctor. I keep thinking I'm a comedian.
Doctor: You must be joking.

What do you call a party held in a basement?
A cellar-bration.

Did you hear about the stupid yachtsman who had his arm cut off so that he could sail round the world single-handed.

What is worse than finding a maggot in your apple?
Finding half a maggot...

I wrote this slowly 'cos I know you can't read very fast

When her boyfriend actually agrees with her, she lets him have his own way.

What should you do with a sick ship?
Take it to the doc.

My wife is a careful driver, she always slows down when going through a red light.

Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
No body.