A consultant is a person who borrows your watch, tells you what time it
is, pockets the watch, and sends you a bill for it.
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Fish
Where do fish keep their money?
In river banks.
Doctors
Doctor, Doctor I tend to flush a lot.
Don't worry it's just a chain reaction.
UFO
What do you get if you cross a baby with a ufo?
An unidentified crying object.
Doctors
My brother went to the doctor. He said, 'I feel like a bar of soap.
The doctor said, 'That's life, boy.'
Ring
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Bella!
Bella who?
Bella no ringa, so I knocka!
Hen
What do you get if you cross a hen with some gunpowder?
An eggsplosion.
Dad
This kid said to me, 'My dad can beat your dad up.'
I said to him, 'That's nothing. So can my mum.'
Patience
Give me patience and I want it now!
Three Bears
Which monster ate the three bears' porridge?
Gouldilocks.