How do you keep a blonde girl busy all day?
Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.
How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday night?
Tell her a joke on Thursday.
How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?
Shine a flashlight in her ear.
How do you murder a blonde?
Put spikes on her shoulder pads.
How is a blonde like a beer bottle?
They are both empty from the neck up.
How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. She holds the bulb, and the world revolves around her.
How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, 'Daaady!'
How many blondes does it take to play Hide and Seek?
One.
I might be a dumb blonde, but I am good at speling.

Julie, the blonde, was becoming increasingly desperate for cash. She decided to go to the more attractive, wealthier neighborhoods in town and search for odd jobs as a handywoman. At the first residence Julie went to, a man answered the door and told her, "Yeah, I have a job for you." "How would you like to paint the porch?" 'That sounds wonderful,' Julie replied. 'Well, how much do you want?' asked the man. 'Is fifty bucks OK?' Julie asked. 'Yeah, that's great. You'll find the paint and ladders in the garage.'
The man went back to his house, where his wife had been patiently listening. Fifty dollars! She was asked by the wife if she knew the porch went around the entire house. "Well, she must have been; she was standing right on it!" stated her husband.
After about 15 minutes, Julie knocked on the door. The astonished homeowner heard her say, "I'm done." The man was shocked. 'You painted the whole porch?' Julie said, "Yeah, I even had paint left over, so I put on two coats!" The man took money out of his wallet to pay Julie. Julie added, "Oh, and by the way, that's not a Porch, that's a Ferrari."
One day, a blonde sat in a bar next to a redhead. They were sitting there having a good time, and the news was turned on.
The woman reporter shouted, 'A man is at the edge of a cliff, and he is planning to jump!'. Then the redhead leans over to the blonde and whispers in her ear, 'I bet you $50 that the man will jump!' The blonde responds, 'That's a bet you have there!'.
So, both women stared at the news waiting to know what would happen. Then, the man jumps! The blonde turns around to the redhead and hands her the $50. The redhead, feeling guilty, said, 'I can't take your money. I saw the news earlier this morning; I knew he was going to jump off that cliff.'
And the blonde says, 'Well, I did too! But I never would have thought the man would do it again!'
One day, a brunette was driving home from work, and as she got out of the car, she heard her blonde neighbor crying. 'Oh my god, what's wrong?' the brunette asked. 'My mother just died!' said the blonde crying out. Feeling sorry for the blonde, the brunette comforted her the whole day. The next day, the brunette saw the blonde crying outside. 'Now what on earth is wrong?!' said the brunette. 'Oh, it's terrible...my sister called, and her mother died too!'