Parrots
What is a polygon?
A dead parrot.
Taxes
Don't overtax yourself; it's the government's job to do that.
Consultants
Shall we bring in a consultant, or shall we screw it up ourselves?
Lightbulbs
How many executives does it take to change a light bulb?
A roomful - they must meet to discuss the change's ramifications.
Flowers
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog and a bunch of daisies?
You get collie-flowers.
Vacations
Where do ghosts go for a vacation?
They head for the Dead Sea.
Bankrupt
Fred: I'm sorry your rubber ball factory went bankrupt.
George: Yes, but I'll bounce back.
Elephants
Why are elephants so wrinkled?
Have you ever tried ironing one?
Retiring
Doctor: The best time to take a bath is just before retiring.
Patient: You mean I don't need another bath until I'm sixty-five?