Joke Topic - 'Ambulance'

You know you're having a bad day when - You start to put up the clothes you wore home from the party last night ....and there aren't any.

How do frogs die?
They Kermit suicide.

Did you hear about the man who stole 10 bars of soap from a supermarket?
He made a clean getaway.

How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?

What do you get if you cross a worm with an elephant?
Great big holes in your garden.

How did your mom know that you didn't wash your face?
I forgot to wet the soap.

Patient: Doctor, I feel like a window.
Doctor: Tell me where the pane is.

To err is human to really foul things up requires a computer.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Raptor.
Raptor who?
Raptor presents before Christmas.