A dog walked into a fast-food restaurant and ordered a cup of coffee. He drank it and then left.
The customers in the restaurant were amazed. One of them said to the assistant behind the counter. "That's quite a dog! Does he always do that?"
"Oh, no." the assistant answered. "He usually orders a diet coke."
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Widow
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every
night?
A widow.
Horse
Did you hear about the horse who became depressed?
He started telling tales of whoa.
Bride
The bride looked stunning and the groom looked stunned.
Toys
What children's toy hates to be touched?
Lego!
Blondes
Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
A: A Space Invader.
Dentists
When I talk people listen with their mouth open.
Oh, you must be a dentist.
Business
Knock knock.
Who's there?
It's Nana.
It's Nana who?
It's Nana your business.
Kettles
What is another name for a water otter?
A kettle.
Clocks
This bloke said to my brother, 'I think I'm a clock you know.'
My brother said, 'Well don't get wound up about it.'