Joke Topic - 'A Bad Stomach'

Joe: Oh, I wish I'd listened to my mother!
Will: Why? What did she tell you?
Joe: I don't know! I didn't listen!

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Juicy.
Juicy who?
Juicy who threw the snowball at me?

Why did Dracula become a vegetarian?
Because stake doesn't agree with him.

Why do dairy cows never have any money?
Because the farmer milks them dry.

Did you hear about the robbers who fell in the sea?
They started a crime wave.

Did you hear about the man who stole a truck load of eggs?
He only did it for a yolk.

Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.

My uncle said, 'I wonder what'll happen if I feed gunpowder to my chickens?'
I said, 'You'll probably get an eggsplosion.'

Good turns make me dizzy