Home / Funny Answering Machine Messages / Funny Answering Machine Messages - Page 9

Funny Answering Machine Messages - Page 9


Here are more of our funny, amusing and strange joke answering machine messages.

This is page 9 of 9. Showing jokes 81 to 85

Funny Answering Machine Messages
Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped with her tape deck, so I'm stuck taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone.
Funny Answering Machine Messages
Hello. I'm David's answering machine. What are you?
Funny Answering Machine Messages
"Hi. Now you say something."
Funny Answering Machine Messages
Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
Funny Answering Machine Messages
Hello. I'm home right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it.


Here are some randomly selected jokes from other categories

Fish

I used to have a fish as a pet. Poor little thing it was deaf. So I bought it a herring aid.

I love cats...they taste just like chicken.

Permanent

Dave: Did you hear that Fred has got a job at the bowling alley?
Joe: What tenpin?
Dave: No it's a permanent job.

Waiters

Waiter, waiter, what's in this stuff?'
'It's bean soup, sir.'
'I asked for its recipe, not its history.'

Who appears in cowboy films and is always broke?
Skint Eastwood.

Dogs

What breed of dog would you want on your American football team?
A golden receiver.

You are currently on page 9 of 9

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9