Did You Hear? Jokes - Page 6

Did you hear about the man put on a clean pair of socks every day of the week.
By Friday he could hardly get his shoes on.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed optician?
He could never see eye to eye with his patients.

Did you hear about the paranoid blood hound?
He was convinced that certain people were following him.

Did you hear that the price of duck feathers has risen?
So now even down is up.

Did you hear about the new deodorant that has just been invented? It is called "Vanish".
You spray it on and you become invisible - so no one knows where the smell is coming from.

Did you hear about the man who stole a truckload of eggs?
He has returned them. Apparently he only did it for a yolk.

Did you hear about the two cyclops who were always arguing with each other?
They could never see eye to eye about anything.

Did you hear about the man who gave up his job as a fishmonger?
He said it was making him shelfish.

Did you hear about the neurotic octopus?
He was a crazy mixed-up squid.

Did you hear about the a fish that wanted to borrow some money?
He went to visit the loan shark.