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British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories - Page 5


More of our British style of humour

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British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
What do you call the people who are made of rubber and stand at the entrance to a nightclub?
Bouncers.
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
Last night I got into a taxi and said to the driver, 'Robin Hood's Close'.
He said 'Don't worry, I'm sure that I can lose him at the next set of traffic lights'.
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
Did you hear that the police have put out a warning to house owners about a gang of men who recently failed in their attempt to steal the tiles from the roof of a local house?
The police said they were roofless criminals.
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
Why is it a bad idea to iron a four leaf clover?
Because you should never press your luck.
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
Dave: Did you hear that Fred has got a job at the bowling alley?
Joe: What tenpin?
Dave: No it's a permanent job.
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
Why is 5 o'clock in the morning a bit like a pigs tail?
Because it's twirly!
Submitted by: VJ
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
My sister fell in love with a famous cricket player.
She was completely bowled over by him.
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
Why did King Arthur have a round table?
So no one could corner him.
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
Fred goes into a hotel and says to the receptionist 'I'd like a room please.'
Receptionist: 'Single, Sir?'
Fred: 'Yes, but I am engaged.'
British Humour - Jokes and Funny Stories
Did you hear about the idiot who thought Hamlet was an omlette served with bacon?

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